Well, hello there.
Since the beginning of January I have kept telling myself "Hey, you should really do a New Year's post for your poor neglected blogglings." I totally agreed. So here I am. With only these four last days of January to go! Yipes, where did this month go?!
So, Happy Belated New Year, guys! 2016! WOOT! So far it's been a very good year and I'm liken' that. 2015 was tough. And it showed through my lack of blogging. The beginning of the year started out really well and then a lot of not so great stuff happened during the latter part of the year and I sunk into a depression that I had a really hard time pulling myself out of. Too many things were happening that were having a negative effect on my life. Family problems on both sides of our families which was causing emotional pain and stress, physical pain from my neck and shoulder (I'll talk more on that later) that was leaving me exhausted and not being able to do things that I used to be able to do, our future plans constantly changing, and me still not being able to get pregnant after 2 1/2 years of marriage, in which we have been completely open to life. Just to name a few.
I was losing hope and having a hard time believing anything was going to get better.
I didn't feel like I should blog in the state I was in. I don't ever want this blog to become a negative and depressing place. So, I stayed away. I was taking less pictures, doing less of what I liked to do, and part of that was due to the physical fatigue I was experiencing. I just didn't feel up to anything.
I wasn't putting my trust in God, either. I'm one of those people who thinks they can handle everything on their own with little to no help from others. I wasn't looking for the good in everything. Even in the bad stuff that was happening, there were good things coming from it. I was just too blind to see it.
Well, slowly but surely, things started changing for the better.
The family issues are definitely taking their time, but there has been progress. Praying and talking to God about it definitely helps! Learning to keep my calm about it is going to take a while, but I'm willing to change for the better. I'm definitely healing though, which is good.
My neck pain is so much better now! I shall explain about that:
About two years ago now, I started have discomfort on the left side of my neck. I thought I was just getting stiff necks from the pillow I was using, so I changed pillows. Still had discomfort. We had several different pillows in the house, so I tried all of them to see if they made a difference. Not enough. The pain kept getting worse and I just kept thinking I was sleeping on my neck wrong. Then the migraines started. It came to a point where I was getting them every couple of days and my neck pain kept getting worse. I was exhausted when I would get home from work. I do a lot of manual work at my job, cleaning and such, so by the time I got home, I was pooped. I started taking naps when I would get home, because that was the only way I could cope with the pain (migraines and neck). Robert started cooking dinner because of how I was feeling and it made me feel awful that I couldn't make dinner for him. He's a wonderful cook, but I just felt guilty that I couldn't even help him. He kept telling me that I should go to a chiropractor and I kept insisting that we didn't need to spend the money. That was dumb on my part. Eventually I finally caved and made an appointment. I started going to an upper cervical chiropractor in June. My x-rays showed that my head wasn't on straight (nothing new there!), it was setting off center, to my left . My neck was slightly twisted and curving in the opposite direction it should have been, and my shoulder was having some issues as well. No wonder I felt like crap. I started out on weekly adjustments, and now I am on every two week adjustments and it looks like I'm close to moving to three. Robert has been going to the same person because it helps relieve pain from his scoliosis. It's just amazing the difference I have felt these past several months! I don't get migraines caused by my neck anymore and I feel close to being back to normal (whatever normal is)! I could just kick myself for not going sooner, but what happened, happened. And now I'm on the right track :)
As for the fertility issues, we recently found out that my progesterone levels were very low. So low, that I wasn't able to conceive. SO. We're working on fixing all that, and I'm so happy that I know what to do now. I have a chance at having children! I also have hope now, which was pretty much gone before.
So anyways, GOALS FOR 2016!
1. Worry less - I am the Queen of worrying. I just need to stop stressing out about everything.
2. Let go and let God - "Let it go, let it gooooooo!" *Ahem* Something I definitely need to work on.
3. Get up earlier - This has been going really well! For awhile there, Robert and I were not giving ourselves enough time before work to get ready and enjoy our breakfast. Now I'm not inhaling my food every morning :)
4. Stop feeling like your house has to be perfect all the time- Because it doesn't. I feel like this is a disillusionment that young housewives have. Plus I don't have time to make it perfect so, y'know. I'll have to learn to pretend that dust doesn't bother me :P
5. Blog more! - Can I get a 'Heck YES!'? I'm also thinking about changing my blog's look, but that may take a while. I need to get my techy-ness up to date.
6. Possibly become a homeowner? - Because that would be, like, AWESOME. A house with a lot of natural light would be nice.
7. Cook from scratch more - Especially since I just found out I'm gluten intolerant :P I get to join my husband in his agony! Last year I did very well on trying new recipes, but I want to do even more this year.
I think I'll leave it at that before I overwhelm myself :P
So there you have it. You got to hear about my not so fun experience. I hope it sounded more like explaining then complaining because that is what I was going for. I remind myself every day that others have it so much worse than I have ever had. I'm just going to take one day at a time and not let myself get down anymore. Because it doesn't help at all.
I hope 2016 is treating all of you well, and that it is the best year yet!